Drinking Breastmilk and Driving a Dangerous Combination

Poll: What is more dangerous to yourself and others.

1. Driving while talking on a cell phone.
2. Driving while eating
3. Driving while not buckled up
4. Driving while not buckled up AND breastfeeding!

I think I'd pick #4. A 47 year old woman in Germany disagrees though. She was objecting to being pulled over by an officer for doing exactly that because she thought it was ok to do since she was so close to home and would have made it safely.

I'm sorry, but I can just imagine the little one suddenly squirming, and she swerves into another late and boom. Rocket baby with milk thrusters happens. Crazy.

Now, there are 4 issues for me in this story. 1. Woman not buckled up. 2. Babies are supposed to be in the back seat in those damned puzzle like seats that are impossible to undo. Did she pull the baby out while driving? 3. Breastfeeding an unsecured baby in a moving vehicle. 4. 47 years old??? 18 month baby??? Breastfeeding?? Does this woman win an oldest mom award?  Also, a little too old to be at the boob?

They were fined for "failing to provide proper security for herself or her child"

I wonder though why the baby wasn't given a fine for drinking while driving.

Drunk Parrots Falling From the Sky

We've all heard of the drinking bird.  But the drunken bird?

In an Australian town Darwin (how ironic!) every year around this time it is not uncommon to see a drunk or hungover parrot crash down somewhere in the town or simply just passing out and falling out of the trees.

Researchers figure that these red-collared lorikeets are eating something during the tropical wet season, and that its leaving them either sick with a drunk-like illness or just plain wasted.

The hospital takes care of about 30 birds at a time and they arrive daily. 

Some of them spotted with tiny lampshades on their heads and they wake up to regretfully find tattoos of their ex girlfriends name on their wing.  Well, maybe not.

While in the drunk tank they nurse them back to health with some aspirin, and some strong coffee before releasing them back into the wild.  Or maybe just some berries and nuts and water. 

Potato potato, tomato tomato. (That saying really doesn't come out right when written)

Man Arrested for Dirty Diaper Fetish

A Wisconsin man was recently convicted of possession of burglary tools and sentenced to 30 months of probation, 200 hours of community service and undergo a psycho-sexual examination.  (I didn't even know such an exam existed.)

He was detained by a homeownder after entering their home last September.  Upon investigation, the sherrif's deputy found six, SIX dirty diapers in the robbers pockets. 

He claims that he entered the house because he likes to wear diapers and thought there might be some in the house.

So wait, he had to break into someones home, to steal their baby's diaper instead of, oh, I don't know.  Buying some.  Maybe pooping in them himself if he needed them dirty. 
Also, he wants to wear them?  Where on earth is he going to wear them?  His head?  I saw a picture of this guy.  No way is he going to fit into these diapers. 
He couldn't come up with a less creepy story either?  Like, he needed fertilizer for his herb garden at home...?

When asked whether he intended to steal the dirty diapers, he answered yes.

I wonder how that conversation went - "Did you mean to break into a house and shove diapers in your pockets?" 
"No, I just got lost, then when I got confronted I panicked! I thought if I padded my clothing and looked  bigger I'd seem more imposing. You know, like a stinky puffer fish."
Yes, a stinky puffer fish.

What a crappy guy.

Enuf is Enuf! Protesters Descend on Spelling Bee!

To make a point, I did not spell check this article!

Because we all know that there is nothing more imporant than proper spelling and grammer. (As evidenced by any Youtube video thread where 1/2 of the posts are people correcting other peoples spelling)


But in Washington, they don't believe in proper spelling. They want sensical spelling!


"Our alphabet has 425-plus ways of putting words together in illogical ways," says one of the protestors.


Representing the American Literacy Council and the London-based Spelling Society they arrived at the National Spelling Bee at the Grand Hyatt, some dressed
in full-length black and yellow bee costumes.


Simplify simplify simplify! Is their message.


Their logo, "Enuf is enuf. Enough is too much."


According to them words such as "fruit" should be changed to "froot", "slow" to "slo", and "heifer" to "hefer".


So what is the point of this all I wonder. Are they just really poor spellers and want to change the world to match their shortfalls? Do they just have too much time on their hands? Is this the first step in creating Orwells "Newspeak?"


If they complain about this, maybe they should try to learn Chinese. Their heads just might explode!

The Grim Eater Dining on Dead Peoples Dollar

We've heard of wedding crashers, and party crashers, but funeral crashers?
For about 2 months, in Australia, a man attended funeral after funeral pretending to be a mourner and eating the food offered.

The man, who was about 40 years old went to different churches and venues bringing a backpack and Tupperware containers so when no one was looking, he would stock up on his illbegotten food.

One funeral home reported him as showing up even as much as 3 or 4 times a week munching on the mortuary meals.

They didn't mind him too much because atleast he was "always very quiet and polite, and did as the rest of the mourners did in paying his respects."

One funeral home is allowing him to still return, but asked him not to pack his food away in plain sight.

So is this man thrifty? Or crazy?